What's up, people? I know, I'm getting really creative here. Funny story - I actually had a different greeting on here that I got from Google, and turns out it was a horrible word. So... lesson learned. Never, ever turn to Google for your silly blogger greetings. Just a word of advice. And thank you to the lovely reader who notified me as to what that meant. Oh my gosh. So embarrassed! You can add that to the awkward list for today.
Anyway. Moving on. If you were a creepy stalker who sat around and watched us in our home for hours on end fly on the wall in our apartment, you would witness some ridiculous things. Some of which are awesome, some of which are awkward. I bring you Awkward and Awesome: At Home with the Garners Edition. Although... there's so much awkward, I think I'll save the awesome for next week.
Part One: Awkward.
Let me talk about the awkward first, because there's just so much to go around:
- occasionally coming home to a drunk landlord (at 8:30 p.m.). I feel like this doesn't really need too much explanation.
- coming home from the grocery store with a bunch of frozen goods. You may think, but why is this awkward? Because we have a freezer the size of a shoe box. Watching your 6'7" husband trying with all his might to shut a tiny fridge is actually quite awkward, but also hilarious.
- The tricks Hubby plays on me. It is not unusual for Hubby to jump out from a dark corner at 2:00 in the morning as I'm walking by, fresh out of the shower, wrapped in a towel, humming "Hit Me Baby One More Time" to myself. I then scream at the top of my lungs, drop my towel, and turn to run. Yeah, we're cool.
- having more than 2 guests over at once. I recently invited 5 people over to our 450 sq. ft. apartment without really thinking. We have one table and 4 chairs. Yeah, not enough room for 7 people. We ended up sitting in our bedroom/living room to eat. It was fine, until I accidentally ninja-kicked the jar that I was drinking out of (we only have 4 glasses...) under the couch. It shattered.
the room in which the ninja-kicking took place, and the couch under which the jar shattered.
- How loud we are. Thank goodness for well-built German houses, otherwise we'd be on the street. It is not unusual for us to break out into song (at the top of our lungs), for me to scream at the top of my lungs when I see a huge spider, or for me to yell to Hubby to get my towel for me because I forgot to grab it before I went to shower. And believe me - I am loud. I bet I could beat any of you in a "how loud can you be" contest. Random fact - my mom once told me to use my inside voice, and I yelled back at her, "THIS IS MY INSIDE VOICE!!!"
- The obscene amount of pop that we drink. Guys, it's not only awkward, it's borderline unhealthy. I'm not even going to tell you how much it is because it's awful. Let me just show you our weekly supply.
- How intense games get. I'm really competitive. Really. I get it from my dad. Anyway, it also happens to be that Hubby is really good at games, and he always wins. Every time. This makes me mad. After 5 or 6 games of something, I generally accuse him of cheating, then I throw my hands in the air, tell him I will never play with him again, then go sulk. Three hours later, I feel the need to redeem myself, and the whole cycle repeats itself.
So there you have it. Stay tuned, because next week the theme will be how awesome we are. Ha.
PS Don't forget about the Sunday Confessions Link Party!