I know, I know. 2 posts in one day. In my defense, though, the first post really involved no effort, and I did it because I was lacking inspiration. You know what's funny, though?
I just got inspired. BAM. Just like that.
I want to start off by sharing something with you all. I got a rockin' pair of shoes on Saturday. No, this post is not just about my shoes. Seriously though, they are awesome. Dead sexy, even. What, you want to see them? Okay, here's a picture of me and my awesome shoes (psh, no... I didn't just run and go get dressedup to show them to you in an impromptu photo sesh). That being said... Sorry for the awful lighting.
ANYWAY... Let me tell you something about these shoes. More specifically, let me tell you about me in these shoes. I am about 6'5.5" in these puppies. I believe that qualifies me as a giant.
You may be thinking to yourself, "Psh. Whatever, Alyx. Go ahead, wear your heels, be a freak... but why blog about it?" Well... I guess just to get it out there.
Dear Normal and/or Short People of the World,
Yes, I know I am tall. I don't play basketball - never have, never will. I play volleyball for fun, but never on a team. No, the weather isn't any different up here. Six inches doesn't make a difference in the climate. Yes, I can get whatever is on the top shelf down for you, but only if you ask nicely. Please don't look up at my face, then immediately look down at my shoes to see if I'm wearing flats or heels. For some reason, that really annoys me.
Also, I love to wear heels. If and when you see me wearing heels and you say, "Why are you wearing heels? You're tall enough as it is," I will want to punch you in the face. I don't need your input on my shoe collection. What?! My legs are freakishly long? No, I didn't know that. I didn't search for years trying to find a pair of jeans long enough to keep these things warm in the winter, either. But thanks for letting me know that my hip is higher than your boobs.
Finally, I would just like to say this: PLEASE make toilet seats higher. I swear one of these days I am going to get stuck on the toilet because it is so close to the ground. While we're on the subject of making things higher... let me also mention countertops. I'm going to look like the hunchbackofNotreDame before too long if this issue isn't fixed, although I guess if I live the rest of my life stuck on a too-short toilet, that won't really be an issue.
Alyx the Giant
This picture makes me look extra tall. I thought it appropriate for this post.
All you tall ladies out there - LISTEN UP. It's okay to wear heels. It's okay to embrace your height. Don't slouch around and be embarrassed because of it - work it. Also... if you're taller than me and we happen to meet one day, I will probably give you a weird look, because it freaks me out. I'm just not used to it. Sorry in advance.