Oh, COME ON!! Even I Could Catch That [& Other Things to Scream at a Football Game]

You guys. 
I don't know if you know this, but I am a HUGE [American] college football fan. Like, it is ridiculous. 
The sun setting at a night game - sometimes being in the nosebleeds has its perks! 
I don't know why, but I wanted to talk about football today. I think it's about that time of the year where I start going through football withdrawals and counting down to the next season. 
See the face I'm making in this picture? That's me, pretty much the entire game. 
OBVIOUSLY I'm a Nebraska fan. So... if you're a Texas or Oklahoma fan... we can't be friends. On game days. 
I thought I'd share my top five favorite things to scream at refs and Taylor Martinez during a Nebraska football game. I may or may not yell these things even if I'm at home, watching the game on tv. 
1. SOMEONE GET ME A FRICKIN UNIFORM!!! I THROW LIKE A GIRL, AND I'D STILL DO BETTER THAN YOU!! Because, yes, he can hear me screaming from the nosebleed section, and yes, I can throw the ball 20 yards. Are you sensing my sarcasm?
2. PULL YOUR HEAD OUT OF YOUR BUTT AND USE IT TO LOOK FOR OPEN RECEIVERS!!!! Because obviously the quarterback should be able to see exactly what I see on the big screen. Who cares if he's on the field with a bunch of offensive linemen blocking his line of sight?
We get to games a few hours early, so how do we kill time until the screaming starts? PICTURES!
3. IF YOU HAD ONE MORE EYE, REF, YOU'D BE A FREAKING CYCLOPS!!! I generally do not like referees. Mostly because they make a lot of bogus calls. Statistically, only 1 in every 7 calls made by a ref is accurate. What? You call BS on my statistics? Good, because I just made that up.
When I'm not screaming, I'm taking ridiculous pictures of myself and Husband.
4. WHAT IS THIS?! POWDER PUFF FOOTBALL FOR PANSIES? SUCK IT UP AND GET YOUR HEAD IN THE GAME!!! Because getting sacked by a 300 pound, 6'7" monster doesn't hurt one bit.
5. PUT SOME UNIFORMS ON THE MARCHING BAND - MAYBE THEY'D ACTUALLY GET SOMETHING DONE!!!! Hey - don't hate on the band - I bet they would surprise you.
So. What are your favorite things to yell at sporting events? I think I'm in need of some new material... 


Also - for JUNE I have 3 small ad spots left, 3 medium ad spots left, and 1 feature ad spot left.

14 comments:

Raych said...

1. Seeing the sea of red in your pics gave me goosebumps. I haven't been to a home game since i graduated **cough** 5 years ago **cough** When we lived in Texas we would go to the away games. I may have gotten into some verbal altercations in College Station but nobody can prove it.

2. I hate Taylor Martinez

3. I cried when Carl announced he was leaving.

4. Husker Fans are EVERYWHERE. In Texas we would meet up with a group called Houstonians for Huskers and here in NYC we have a group called New York Society for Nebraskans. Its awesome to watch the game with other Husker fans who get it.

5. I'm gonna end this because its kinda long and I could talk forever about Husker football.

Katrin said...

Haha, you made me laugh so much!
I have no idea who Taylor Martinez is (I am sorry, I am still learning the rules of football so I don't know much about it.) but I act exactly the same when I watch soccer! :)

Unknown said...

BAHAHA this made me laugh!

Unknown said...

ooo football! I'm with ya there! And hey, i love your blog! super cute! new follower right here!:)
XO-Taesha {tay-shaw}
www.taeshac.blogspot.com

Keri said...

I can't relate to this...I'm not a football fan. But my Mom is and she is constantly screaming at her TV!

My husband is already researching and getting ready to put his fantasy team together.

Sigh. :)

Sierra @ Sierra's View said...

Gah. I love people like you at football games (and sporting events).
Why?
because I'M one of those people at football games.
What can I say, I'm a huge sports lover. (and crazed fan?)
hehe

Keetha Broyles said...

Hi Alyx!! Keri sent me, YEP I'm her mom.

OK now, I'm a WISCONSIN fan so I'm pretty sure now that you're in the Big Ten we're gonna be one of your worst nightmares and vice versa so I guess we can't be friends on game day EITHER!

I may yell different things, but I DO YELL at the TV. Sure wish the coaches would LISTEN to me.

I'll be surprised if you are any "bigger" an NCAA fb fan than me - - - you may TIE me - - - but I'm pretty sure NO ONE COULD POSSIBLY WATCH MORE college ball on any given Saturday in the fall than I do.

Yep - - - I turn on Gameday for at least the last half hour and then when the games start, I'm going between 5 or 6 games ALL DAY LONG until midnight. Of course, when Wisconsin takes the field, I STOP switching back and forth between games, and just bite my nails and pull out my hair and scream at the TV during the entire game.

I even watch the draft.

AND I post about football on my blog FREQUENTLY - - - anyone who's followed me for more than a month KNOWS I'm big time football.

It is sooooo fun to meet someone like moi!

See you in YOUR stadium, so to speak, this fall when my Badgers come to TRY to give your Huskers another whippin'

;-)

Brianna said...

Lovin' your adventures!!

Alana Christine said...

bahahahahahahah. I love this. I'm from Oklahoma, but I'm not really partial to OU or OSU, so I guess we can still be friends!!

Maria Larsen said...

haha, so if I'm theoretically a huge LSU fan, can we still be friends? I'm really awesome at yelling at refs though, cause I'm pretty sure we get some of the stupidest ones to call our games..

Unknown said...

That sounds like me when I drive! Hahaha!

Alex, Speaking Denglish said...

haha I love the uniforms on the marching band - football causes so much joy and so much pain. Joy for me in the 2009 Big XII Championship :P

Are you going to be a USC fan now?

Sara Louise said...

Since we've been blog friends for a bit now, I think it's time I let you in on a little secret... you ready? I'm a Longhorn *gasp* *shock* *horror*

Unknown said...

YES YES YESS!!! i love gameday so much. I'm a junior at UNL and LIVE for husker football! woo!