Before I go into part two of my little pregnancy series that I like to call What to Expect when You're Expecting (an extremely condensed and not at all accurate Representation of Pregnancy) (you can find part one here), I wanted to let you all know that the book for February is Something Borrowed. If your library has a waiting list, get on it now!
Anyway. Now it is time for part two...
Things I Wish People had Told me about Pregnancy
11. How often you will have to show off your lady parts. Ummm let's just talk about how open us pregnant ladies have to be. I mean, obviously I knew that I'd be showing the whole world my junk during labor, but I didn't expect so much of it before the fact.
I knew what dilation was, but it did not occur to me how they would measure. It also did not occur to me that I would have to do a vaginal ultrasound along with a normal one at my 20-week appt. It ALSO did not occur to me that if you are having any strange symptoms down there, the doc will want to check it out.
12. You will be scratching more than a monkey on crack. I found myself scratching my boobs in public today, and I didn't notice until I'd been doing it for a good thirty seconds. I'm constantly trying to relieve myself of my itchy stomach, as well, so I probably just look like some chunky meth-head.
13. Your mouth will never be the same. Weird, right? Your gums will probably bleed. If you've had braces, your teeth will move more than usual. You may drool more than normal.
14. You will not only scratch like a monkey - you will probably start to look like one, too. Your hair will grow thicker (and, in my case, darker). This is great for your head, but not so great for your arms, legs, and umm... other places.
15. TUMS aren't candy - they actually have a purpose, and you will come to keep them around for said purpose, not just because they taste good. Or am I the only one that treated TUMS like candy before I got pregnant? Anyway, you'll go through a bottle of that stuff if you're lucky enough to get the killer heartburn that oh, so many prego ladies get.
And that is where I stop. Next up - What to Expect when You're Expecting (Part 3) - and this time we'll be talking about FOOOOOOODDDD!!!!