Let's try this confession thing again

Happy Sunday! 

Blah blah blah (insert something snarky, yet charming here)... blah blah blah... I don't feel like scraping the bottom of my brain for something interesting to say in this post intro... blah. blah. BLAH.

1. My boobs post-baby suck. There, I said it. They are smaller than they were before and they're like deflated balloons. Thanks, Elsie. But... really, I love you so much that I am okay with the fact that I gave up my boobs for you.

2. I'm obsessed with the Better Homes and Gardens candles from Wal-Mart. I seriously think they're better than Yankee Candles. And that's saying a lot, because I hate Wal-Mart with a fiery burning passion (meaning that I also have to hate everything that comes from Wal-Mart).

3. Since discovering running tights, I don't know if I'll ever run in shorts again. Eh, who am I kidding?! The second it gets above 40 degrees I'll be singing the song, "Who wears short shorts? ALYX wears short shorts!" and bouncing down the street in my neon yellow running shorts.

4. I hate running, but I signed up for a half marathon. I think I was drugged and forced against my will to sign up. Or someone spiked my kool-aid. Or I am just really good at succumbing to peer pressure.

5. I've gots da baby fever. You can thank newborn photography for that. I mean, really - just LOOK AT THIS BABY!!!

CONFESSIONS!!!!!

Like, OMG!

I'm blogging. And it's not a monthly Elsie update. Look at the sky, because you may or may not see pigs flying.

Anyway... I know that this is the first time in forever that I've done Sunday Confessions, so I'm not even going to bother making it a link up this week.

1. I absolutely love looking at homes. We aren't even really looking to move right now, but we have been going to different homes around town just to get an idea of what we will want when we upgrade to a bigger home. I have absolutely LOVED it. This could be because we are looking primarily at homes built in the early 1900's, and those always have character. So far, this is my favorite:

Zillow

2. I am constantly analyzing photos that pop up in my news feed. It's bad. I look at them and pick them apart in my head, whether they're professional images or simple snapshots. I guess this is the curse of being a photographer.

3. On that note, it is REALLY hard for me to post my own pictures without tearing them apart first, even if they're snapshots. If it's not taken with my iPhone, I tear it apart, and 9 times out of 10, I won't post it on my personal page if I wouldn't post it on my professional page.

4. I sometimes think that brushing my teeth requires a lot of effort. I always brush, simply because I have to wear my retainer every night, but that doesn't mean I don't grumble about having to do it. HA!

5. I want another baby, but I'm scared that I wouldn't love her/him as much as I love Elsie. I know people would probably tell me that that's ridiculous, but it's true! I worry about these things. So, mama's of two or more... how do you love two kids equally?

What do you have to confess? 

How to Lose the Fever - Baby Fever, that is.

HAPPY HOLIDAY MONDAY!!!!! 

I hope you're all having as fabulous a day off of work as I am! At least... I hope I'm having a fabulous day. I'm writing this ahead of time, and I'm no psychic, so who knows how my Monday is going!

Anyway. I occasionally catch the fever - you all know the one I'm talking about. BABY FEVER. It's everywhere, and I hear it's almost impossible to cure.

Lucky for you, though, I think I know someone who has found the cure, and what better day to talk about it than Labor Day? Get it? I knew you would, you all are just so smart.

Anyway, just in case you're suffering from a baby fever of 103, I'll let you read on for the cure. Just know before you start that this girl is awesome, and in case you need any more hilarity in your life, you can find her over on the sidebar under the "Blog of the Month" header.
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Hey all you beautiful people!  I am so excited to be with you today.  My name is Kristen, and I hang out over at This Radiant Life.  When Alyx first asked me about guest posting on Labor day, I knew exactly what to talk about.  You see, I have the fever, friends.  You know the one... where your eyes get glassy, your head is spinning, your stomach flip-flops, just because you see a tiny little being who can't even form a noise resembling any word in the English language. 

Yup, it's baby fever.  I have a chronic condition that I've been nursing for the last 2.5 years or so.  It's hard.  So, what better than to share with you my tips for avoiding baby fever?

Tip #1:  Avoid all cute children.  If you must be around children, make sure they're the ones that scream so loudly in the restaurant that you have to request to be moved to a different section.  Refuse to go visit your family on the grounds that their children are just too adorable.  I present to you exhibit A...

 My cousin's kid.  The cutest, funniest kid I know.  I have to avoid Southern California like the plague because of her.

Tip #2:  If you have to be around cute kids, ask their mothers about the labor and delivery of said child.  Make sure you get every last detail.  Don't let them leave out the part where they couldn't leave the hospital for a few days, because they had a hard time going poo.  Trust me, it will help.

Last, but not least, Tip #3:  Go buy a large size watermelon, and stick it under your shirt.  Carry it around for an hour, and see how it feels.  Then take a picture, and realize what a scary looking pregnant woman you would be if you were about to give birth to a watermelon.  Then cut up the watermelon, and give it to that handsome guy you just forced to take said picture.  If that doesn't cure you, I don't know what will.

And really, it was enough for us... until we'd eaten the entire watermelon, and my cousin had posted yet another awesome picture of her child.  It's a vicious cycle.

So to all you women out there who AREN'T pregnant on this lovely Labor day, I hope this post has helped you find one or two ways that you too can fight the fever.

Thank you again to Alyx for letting me litter her blog with my madness, and thank you for reading it!  To be a part of more of my crazy adventures, you can find my blog here, follow me on Twitter, or even Pinterest.  I would love to hear from you!

Guess Who's Back, Back Again. Baby Fever. Hamsters.

YO MAH HOMIE G GANGSTA FRANDS!!! 


It is so good to be back. I have been up in the Black Hills (that's in South Dakota for all you non-savvy geography folks out there) since the 4th, so if you've been missing my comments and email responses for the past 5 days, that's why!

I'm glad to be back, and I get the feeling that today is going to be full of catching up on blogging because I've missed a lot, so here's a couple of pics of me looking like a sweaty monkey and one pic of the most beautiful placed on earth to keep you company while I'm reading the million posts that I missed.

Sorry for the iPhone quality! Better pics to come!!

Oh, and guess what else I have for you today?! Something awesome (duh, only awesome things happen around here). You can find this something (or someone) on my right sidebar for the whole month - her name is Shane and her blog is Whispering Sweet Nothings. She wrote that one post about the ten blogging commandments and is an all-around cool chica. She's also pretty funny, but don't take my word for it - find out for yourself!

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Hello loyal EIANA readers! Now we are all well aware that Alyx is beyond hilarious. Which is why am honored stunned she trusted me to take over the stage for ths day. Well, here goes nothing.

Now I have a confession to make.

I gots the baby fever.

Okay, so I'm only 20, but hey, biological clocks start ticking earlier and earlier these days, right?

{see pinterest board: kiddos}

All these mama bloggers out there with the cute baby bellies are givin’ me the fever.

Then the ones with 9 kids and counting showcasing darling pictures of their tykes with spaghetti sauce all over their noggins or crayon masterpieces gracing their family room walls (Cute, right?)

I mean, if you can disregard the late night screaming, getting slim to nil hours of shuteye, the poop, and the fact I would have to push it out myself (ouch), they are pretty adorable creatures.

I've even started brainstorming names. This list began as a freshman in high school, scary I know. I made the executive decision to name all of my girls by boy’s names. (To make them suffer through childhood like their mama) haha, kidding, my name is rad.

Girls: Dylan, Ryley, Ashton, Avery, Blake, Kylar, Brooklyn, Nevaeh, Jayden, Audra, Khia, Kamdyn, Addisyn, Aidan, Kyle, Cameron, Eden, Kai, Kayden, Payton, Collette

Boys: Braison, Taylor, Brody, Callaway, Clayton, Cole, Dalton, Kiel, Ayden, Brayden, Alton, Karson, Alden, Brady, Corbin, Keaten, Carmen

Disclaimer: Hipster baby names may or may not have influenced some of these.

After I saw Cheaper by the Dozen at the ripe old age of eleven, I was determined to one day have twelve kids of my own. Just for funsies.

What will your baby look like? Simply upload a picture of yourself and your hunny (Or Ryan Gosling, whichever you prefer) I chose the latter.

Can we say Yikes?

Okay, so I realize I might not be ready to carry a beach ball for 9 months and then raise it for 18 years to eternity. So, for motherhood prep, I figured maybe I could get a puppy or a hamster.

Well, puppies are expensive and hamsters smell.

I decided I’d just start with keeping a bamboo plant alive. water + sunshine = happy vegetation.... right?

Wrong. Say bye bye to Ralph.

Signs you are too young for a baby:

1. You spend 87% of your time on a college campus.

2. You don’t have $100 cash monay in the bank.

3. You can't even take care of a pet.

4. Or yourself.

5. Or a bamboo plant.

Perhaps I should hold off a while longer? Thoughts? Concerns? 

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LOL, Shane, you are so not alone - I have killed every plant I've ever touched. Mine don't even get names because then I'd feel like a serial killer. At least my cat is still alive.

Don't forget to stop by Shane's corner of the blogosphere! Note: isn't it odd that I just said her "corner" of the "sphere?" Anyone else think so, or am I just cray-cray? It's the latter, because I can't believe I just typed "cray-cray." Shoot me now. 

Sunday confessions Link-up.

Heeeyyyyyy you guys!!!! <-- Goonies, anyone? I know I've used that greeting before, but lemme tell ya - it's so hard to come up with new ones. Seriously. 


Anyway, it's Sunday! That means it's time for those confessions, so link up and tell your ridiculous secrets to the world. 

<center><a href="http://garnerfamilyadventures.blogspot.com" target="_blank"><img src="http://farm8.staticflickr.com/7148/6701442513_4c7153a301.jpg" width="200" height="200" /></a></center>

1. I'm addicted to Words with Friends. I also find it hilarious to play words like "titty," "hooters," and "pee." I've had this app on my iPhone since forever... but just got into it. I think I was inspired by McKenzie's addiction. Psst... start a game with me: AlyxGarner

2. I found another way to enjoy Nutella. Okay, two more ways to enjoy it. I can eat it on my pretzels (yum!), or I can stuff my french toast with it (thanks to Sabrina for sending me every Nutella recipe she finds). 

via

3. I have no clue what to do with my life now that I'm done with the Hunger Games. I have gotten some good book recommendations from people, I just need to sit down and figure out where to start next!
4. I slept in until 2:30 p.m. 3 times last week. Yeah, you wish you had a life as lazy as mine. I also spent two entire days in my pajamas. 

5. I may or may not be catching the fever... baby fever. Shhh... I don't want to talk about it - I'm in denial. But seriously... look at this random cute baby that I found in Google by searching "cute baby..." isn't it cute?? 

via

PS: Enter the giveaway here.
Happy Sunday!!!