Howdy hey hi ho!
Can somebody please tell me where that phrase came from? A "whale" of a time? Right now I feel a lot like a whale - moving slowly, blowing a lot of water out of my... eye sockets (that's crying for all you non-metaphorical folk out there), and finding it hard to fit into small places.
toilet hugs a couple weeks ago? How has time gone by so quickly? This baby could arrive any day. Part of me is freaking out, like, Holy balls, I am going to have to take care of another human being. Another part of me still looks at my tummy on a regular basis and thinks, Holy balls, there is a baby in my belly. And still, another small part of me thinks, Holy balls, I need to buy a car seat.
I'm not nervous about labor - I know that my body was made for this. I know that it's completely natural and that millions of women have given birth before me. People always ask me if I'm nervous, and I think they're shocked when I tell them that I'm not nervous about the act of having a baby... I'm nervous about bringing the thing home and actually having the baby!
I realize this post is just a lot of disjointed thoughts, but that's what happens when you're a whale with a parasite - your brain turns to mush. Smelly, icky mush that looks something like this: