Personal.

I don't like it here.

I feel alone.
I feel like I have no purpose.
I have no clients, no work to do, nothing to keep myself busy.
I'm awkward, I suck at making friends, and I miss mine.

I miss home.
I miss my friends. I miss walks to the park.
I miss Nebraska "traffic."
I miss the familiarity of things.

I want to go home.

16 comments:

Lindsey said...

I just scrolled through your last couple posts and I haven't blogged in forever either! And I totally relate to your lasts few posts. I feel like I suck at making friends and that I don't know what to blog about because I only want to blog about my kids. But I just had my second 7 weeks ago and let me tell you, don't worry about not loving your 2nd as much. Honestly you have enough love for both and you'll be amazed at the love they'll have for each other.

Annie said...

I'm sorry, Alyx. This is one of the hardest places to be!

Breenah A said...

*hugs*

I have no advice for making friends because I suck at that, but I think that you'll be able to make friends in no time. The in between time might suck, but that's why you've got the internet.

Nicole Prša said...

I feel ya girl! I've been in Slovenia for almost two years now and it's so hard to make friends. Mommy groups or fitness classes are my idea doe you to meet people. My other advice is try to call one friend or family member on Skype or FaceTime a day so you know you still have people around you who love you even if they're not near. Keep blogging and you've got all of your friends here :)

Genna said...

I can't imagine leaving my home and moving somewhere completely foreign. I too am extremely awkward and haven't had to make friends in years so I bet I'd suck at it too. I'll be praying for you!

Sarah Shumate said...

I'm so sorry, Alyx. Sometimes moving is really easy and your new life fits like a glove, but then other times you move somewhere and suddenly it feels like that glove only has 3 fingers and you'll never fit into it. I hope that time will help, but if it doesn't, don't be afraid to reach out - whether to family and friends back home, or even the few people you've met in your new home. Even if you don't know them well yet, showing vulnerability is one of the quickest ways of making deep friendships. I've learned that from a lifetime of moving from place to place. I'll be thinking about you, sweetie!

Kim Matheson said...

Awh. Shoot. I'm wishing lots and lots of hugs your way. And cupcakes too, because obviously. I'm sorry you're having a rough stretch. I hope things smooth out soon. <3

Krysten Quiles said...

Oh Alyx I'm so sorry. I don't know what to say. Iz and I have talked about moving away before but as much as I would love to get away from Wisconsin winters I think I would react like you.

Keep blogging. And get it out. I'm sure in time it will fade.

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